I found a new to me band, Heilung, and have been chilling out to their tunes for the better part of a week now. They bill themselves as a pagan band and after seeing their live show I can say I agree. The deep bass of the drums, the chanting and Celtic throat singing really tell a tale that is missing from our modern world. Which got me thinking about the duality of my needs in life.

Professionally I work in Info Security, a very tech oriented field. A desk job for the most part and very removed from the music I now find myself enjoying way too much. But there is a need for the primitive in our lives, the old ways and the old traditions that are sorely lacking in our modern lives.

There is something to be said about out progress and the nature of change as a constant of course but there needs to be a balance with tradition and traditionally focused aspects of our lives. Religion in one sense, a sense of community in another, are missing in my current life. Working largely from home I am isolated and being an introvert doesn’t help matters. But finding somewhere where I feel a sense of belonging is not easy. On one hand I am fairly conservative in my politics and outlook in life, on the other I am far removed from the religious values of conservatives in general. That whole Half-assed Taoist mentality. But looking further into the local Taoist community I feel at odds with their outlook on life and overall lifestyle. It just doesn’t jive with who I am as a person or my beliefs.

So I find myself at the boarder lands of life, never belonging to a tribe or really feeling like I belong when I am among those of at least a partly like mind. Being at odds within myself doesn’t help as I want to play with the wolves as much as I want to ponder a technical problem. Where I want to drum all night and 3D print my way into being a business owner.

So I guess the question remains, where do I belong? Or is this truly a path I walk alone? Where might I find like minded people that fit both the modern and the primitive? Where might I find old school values mixed with new technology? If you know of such a place please let me know. Or maybe this is a situation where I need to make my own tribe? I’m sure there are others out there that feel the same… but finding them in the void feels daunting.

I guess it’s time to put up or shut up. What would be a good name for some such community?